How not to talk about the most important person in the room|
When you are at a networking event, who is the most important person in the room?
Personally, when I am at a meeting, I don’t think it is me. I know it is me! And I’ll bet you, no matter how saintly you think you are, that you too think you are the most important person in the room.
That’s not to say the room is full of egomaniacs. Far from it. But the result of you being the most important person in the room is that you stand there with a great big gorilla on your shoulder, who whispers continually in your ear: ‘OK, so what’s in this conversation for me?’
And if you look around the room, you will see that there is at least one gorilla for every person attending. And each one is whispering in each person’s ear: ‘My deadlines, my early night, my order book, my next meeting.’
What’s the solution? The solution is to get what both parties want from a conversation. You want to talk about yourself and so does the other party. So?
Bear with me. At a recent lunchtime seminar run by Marcus Cauchi, he made everyone stand in pairs and talk to each other about themselves. As soon as anyone mentioned the words ‘I’, ‘me’ ‘my’ ‘we’, ‘us’, or ‘our’, they had to sit down. Within seconds most of the room was sitting.
The knowing few realised that the only way to remain standing was to talk about the other person. ‘So what do you do? For whom? How?’ It was a graphic and effective way to illustrate how easy it is to slip into talking about yourself.
So going back to the original question, what is the solution? The answer is simple. The more information you can persuade the other person to part with, the better positioned you are to talk about yourself... should the need arise. By drilling down into the very core of where their ‘pain’ is now, you are able to propose solutions that are much more likely to trigger their hot buttons or at least catch their attention.
Of course, the solution is not necessarily to ‘buy my product’. It may be that you say, ‘Now Peter Jones could help you with just that problem. Let’s go over and talk to him.’
But you still have a wealth of information... and who knows? – when the time comes, you can help them with your own service. Meanwhile, you have earned a reputation for listening, getting to the nub of the issue, and thinking laterally about how you can help them. In short, you have made an ally of them, and possibly Peter Jones, too.
Did you talk about the most important person in the room? No. But you fed the ego of the most important person in the room with useful information, which could help all parties!
Marcus Cauchi runs NRG Gold, which turns sales training on its head. You won’t like it at first because it flies in the face of all conventional wisdom, but you wouldn’t let that stop you if it worked, would you?
To book your place or learn more call Dave Clarke on 0845 40 80 639 or email at dc @ nrg-networks.com.